Tag: divorce

Close the Door to the “D” Word!

Early in my marriage every time Steve and I would get into an argument I would threaten a divorce! It appeared that divorce was being spoken out of my mouth at least once or twice a week, maybe even more depending what we were going through at any given time. Steve’s reaction would be to cower down and allow the heated discourse to cool down. I felt as though I had won the battle!

DID I REALLY WIN? DID I REALLY WANT A DIVORCE? WHERE WAS THIS COMING FROM?

To answer the first question, No, I didn’t win; in actuality the only winner was the devil. He hates marriage and wants every Holy Union of God to be destroyed. He had destroyed my parents marriage and now had his beady eyes on mine!

Did I really want a divorce? No, I didn’t! I wanted my marriage to work, but I was afraid!

Where was all this fear coming from? The origin of this fear came from several locations. For one, it was from a generational curse of divorce that was moving its way from one generation to another throughout my blood line. There were no successful marriages in my family, they had all ended in divorce or were loveless. And then there were my prior failed relationships, where I had been rejected, mistreated and misused and ultimately abandoned. Leaving in its place an indelible lie that eventually my husband would leave me too; it was just a matter of time! So, why wait? Just end it first!

I NEEDED TO BE HEALED!

The first thing that God required of me, was to FORGIVE! Forgive my father for leaving, forgive the others that hurt and left me and most of all forgive myself for the bad choices in relationships I made because I refused to submit to God and do things his way.

Once I forgave the healing began. The Lord said, “TRUST ME AND CHANGE YOUR CONFESSION!” God instructed me to NEVER let the word DIVORCE be spoken out of my mouth again. He told me every time I said the word, I came into AGREEMENT with the host of hell against my marriage and gave the demons permission to bring destruction.

I had to come into agreement with the Word of God that says, “What God has put together let no man tear apart.” Not even me! Divorce from that day forward was off the table, the DOOR WAS CLOSED never to be opened again.

Now, here I am “41” years later MARRIED to the man of my dreams-LOVING FOR A LIFETIME!

http://www.longevityrelationships.com; alicia@longevityrelationships.com;

Book: Longevity: Loving for a Lifetime: https://a.co/d/cAeMCvw

Close the door to the “D” word!

Early in my marriage every time Steve and I would get into an argument I would threaten a divorce! It appeared that divorce was being spoken out of my mouth at least once or twice a week, maybe even more depending what we were going through at any given time. Steve’s reaction would be to cower down and allow the heated discourse to cool down. I felt as though I had won the battle!

DID I REALLY WIN? DID I REALLY WANT A DIVORCE? WHERE WAS THIS COMING FROM?

To answer the first question, No, I didn’t win; in actuality the only winner was the devil. He hates marriage and wants every Holy Union of God to be destroyed. He had destroyed my parents marriage and now had his beady eyes on mine!

Did I really want a divorce? No, I didn’t! I wanted my marriage to work, but I was afraid!

Where was all this fear coming from? The origin of this fear came from several locations. For one, it was from a generational curse of divorce that was moving its way from one generation to another throughout my blood line. There were no successful marriages in my family, they had all ended in divorce or were loveless. And then there were my prior failed relationships, where I had been rejected, mistreated and misused and ultimately abandoned. Leaving in its place an indelible lie that eventually my husband would leave me too; it was just a matter of time! So, why wait? Just end it first!

I NEEDED TO BE HEALED!

The first thing that God required of me, was to FORGIVE! Forgive my father for leaving, forgive the others that hurt and left me and most of all forgive myself for the bad choices in relationships I made because I refused to submit to God and do things his way.

Once I forgave the healing began. The Lord said, “TRUST ME AND CHANGE YOUR CONFESSION!” God instructed me to NEVER let the word DIVORCE be spoken out of my mouth again. He told me every time I said the word, I came into AGREEMENT with the host of hell against my marriage and gave the demons permission to bring destruction.

I had to come into agreement with the Word of God that says, “What God has put together let no man tear apart.” Not even me! Divorce from that day forward was off the table, the DOOR WAS CLOSED never to be opened again.

Now, here I am “33” years later MARRIED to the man of my dreams-LOVING FOR A LIFETIME!

http://www.longevityformarriage.com; alwaysonfire08@yahoo.com;

Book: Principles we live by: Secrets to Longevity: https://www.createspace.com/4984688

 

 

TAKE YOUR CLOTHS OFF!

Take your cloths off!

Struggling to come into the presence of God after a long and trying day; I push myself to try to enter into the Holy Place. Frustration begins to engulf me, instead of being lifted to a high place, I felt myself sinking into a hole. The more I struggled to pull myself out the more I was pulled deeper into the abyss. Thoughts from the day were bombarding my soul, screaming accusations of my unworthiness. Everything I had done or said wrong during the day was over powering the worship songs that were being sung in the back ground. I’m not sure how I got to this place, but I was here none the less. At the point of pure desperation, I raised my hands and said without realizing it, “God I need you!” It was what the Father was waiting for, me to come to a desperate place and cry out to him in my weak and feeble state. He whispered in my hear, “take your cloths off” come to the basin that is in the outer court and bath. Wash off all that has defiled you today. You can’t come into my presence because you have not prepared yourself for your King. Now, come to the basin and take your cloths off my bride. Wash your head, cleansing your thoughts from the vain imaginations, wash your face, your eyes, your ears,you mouth from all the vile things you have seen, heard and said today. Wash your arms from all the unholy things you have embraced; Wash your torso from things you have allowed to enter into your heart; Wash your legs and your feet from those forbidden places you walked today. Now that you are clean and naked, I can lead you into my Most Holy Place; my most intimate place. I will cloth you with my Glory, with my peace, with my love. I can now adorn you with my oil of gladness and you can sip from my wine of healing. Now, that you have taken your cloths off!

As I did everything thing that the Lover of my soul instructed me to do, I was instantly taken to the High Place and it was just him and I.

Oh, the pleasure that flooded my soul, I will never hesitate again to “Take my cloths off.” My King is waiting for me and I will not keep Him waiting. AJ

HUSBANDS: YOU ARE THE BALM OF GILEAD

Black Dr and woman
Husband you have been chosen to bring healing to your wife!

Husbands do you not know that you are to be Christ to your wife, just as Jesus is to the church? In the scripture Jesus is referred to as, “The Balm of Gilead.”

This powerful balm came from the mountainous region of the Jordan Valley. It was a collection of spices, oils and aromatic resins that had medicinal qualities, used for the soothing and the healing of wounds.

This potion was esteemed to be of great value because it was harvested in small quantities and because of its miraculous properties. It was a sought after commodity, exported to distant countries such as Egypt and Tyre; it was referred to as the “Chief of oils.”

It was an ointment used to heal, soothes and alleviates pain. The primary application of this balm was to take some in the hand and rub it on the area of the body experiencing the pain. Even though, it was very powerful, one application was usually not enough; the one applying the balm would have to reapply this healing agent several times during a coarse of hours or even days until the wound was completely healed.

In our coaching practice Steve and I come across extremely wounded women, that have experienced sever injuries from the hands of men.

Now, Before I go any further his is not a male bashing blog!

Many of these women come into their marriages still bleeding or their wounds have formed an ugly hard crust that at the slightest touch or bump, the wound is reopened again, causing excruciating pain as though the injury had just occurred.

Just like the Word says, by one man (Adam), sin and destruction entered into the world, so in the same way life and restoration came into the world by the second Adam, which is Christ. (paraphrased) Rom 5:12-21

The scripture asks this question in Jeremiah 8:22,

Is there no balm in Gilead?

Is there no physician there?

Why then is not the health of my daughter restored?

Husbands, we as wife’s need your healing hands! We need you to wash over our wounds with your words of healing and restoration. Again and Again!!! You, Man of God; is who God has chosen to bring healing to your woman that has experienced wounds and abuse from the “first Adam.” You are that second Adam that has been sent to bring LIFE to your wife!

The question is Husbands, are you the FIRST ADAM or are you the SECOND ADAM, “CHRIST?”

HUSBANDS WE NEED YOU! WHERE IS OUR BALM OF GILEAD? WHERE IS OUR PHYSICIAN…PLEASE BRING HEALING TO US!

The Power of a Woman

Am I the only woman that has tried to change her husband? How many of you have found out that you can’t! The more you fuss, the more you have an attitude, the more you cry or get upset, the worst the thing you want to see changed, gets worse!

So, what’s a girl to do?

I remember going to God very frustrated about some things regarding my husband; I was convinced would never change. He had made some business decisions that had cost our family dearly. I had decided I was going to take things in my own hands and start handling things. As I begin to put my plan into motion, the Father ask me a question.

“So, where has all your fussing, and controlling attitudes gotten you?” I had to admit I was no closer to my goal in changing my husband. God said, “You think the power is within YOU, well its not! The power of change lies within ME! If you want to access this power, you have to find it on your knees.”

God challenged me!

Pray for your husband everyday! Pray that he would operate in wisdom and knowledge; pray that the traps of the enemy would be thwarted and that God would give him the power to be successful. I would ask my husband every morning, “How can I pray for you?” Sometimes he would have a specific request, but most of the time, he would just say, “Let the Lord direct you,” but all the time, he was extremely grateful that I would even care enough to ask! Within no time I begin to see significant change in my husbands decision making. To my surprise he even begin to ask me my opinion before he made a decision. This was quite different and it made me feel important and needed.

So, ladies, I discovered that being in a humbled position on my knees praying for my husband has more power than my words, my attitude or any other manipulative  behavior.

God said to me, “If you are in your place (on my knees) I  will make your husband’s wrong decisions right for you!”

Over the past 30 years, I have found that to be so true and so I continue to pray for my husband every single day!

 

For booking: http://www.longevityformarriage.com Longevity For Marriage

Steve & Alicia Johnson are John Maxwell certified; coaches, speakers and trainers

Purchase our book: “Principles We Live By: Secrets to Longevity!” Purchase book